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Christmas (Bah, Bug and Hum!)

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"Christmas (Bah, Bug and Hum!)" is a song from Olive, the Other Reindeer. It's sung by the postman, as he complains about Christmas and wants it to not happen.

Lyrics

Postman: In the Summertime,
The deliverin's so easy.
My bag is light, and the world is fresh
But by Autumn, I'm getting queasy...

The shoulder strap tears at my flesh,
I'm a zombie by Thanksgiving!
With four weeks' torture still to come,
This is no way to make a living!
Christmas... bah, bug and hum!

One flimsy little Christmas card,
Surely, that can't be too hard!
But multiply it a billionfold,
And see why Christmas leaves me cold.
Christmas... bah, bug and hum!

They cut down bigger, fatter logs,
So I can bring more catalogs!
First class, third class, book rate, bulk!
Isn't anyone, know why I sulk?!
Christmas... bah, bug and hum!

Send a friend a two-ton gift,
I don't mind, I love to lift!
Especially when the weather's freezin',
Oh, yes, I love the Christmas season!
Christmas... bah, bug and hum!

By now, my ligaments are toast,
But here it comes, more parcel post!
Why not splurge, send it priority?
What's one more pain in my...
Posteriority?!
Olive: Posteriority?

Postman: So here's one vote for cancellation,
Of all the Christmas celebration!
If Santa's grounded, that's a start,
For taking strain off my poor heart!

So, turn around!
Go back home, rover!
As of now...
Christmas...
Is over!

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