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Christmastime Is Killing Us

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Christmastime is Killing Us is a song from "Road to the North Pole". In it, Santa Claus and his elves complain about the hardships of working every day until Christmas Eve making presents and receiving all of the kids' wishlists, and how it's made Santa ill and the elves mutated.

Lyrics

Santa:
Each bell would peal with a silvery zeal
As the holiday feeling was filling us.
But now instead, all we're feeling is dread
Because Christmastime is killing us!
Elves:
Each Christmas list gets us more and more ------
Till the thought of existence is chilling us.
Santa:
I'll tell you what. Shove your list up your butt, because...
Santa and Elves:
Christmastime is killing us!
Stewie:
But can't you see that what you do
Is a dream come true?
Can't you see that every smile
Makes it all worthwhile?
Santa:
No, screw you! It's all but through,
There's too much to do.
All those dreams are nightmares
And blank icy stares.
Each little elf used to fill up a shelf
Making playthings and selflessly thrilling us.
Now they're on crack and it feels like Iraq
Because Christmastime is killing us!
Elves:
Each model train only heightens the pain
Of the workload that's straining and drilling us.
Santa:
Fingers all bleed. And look! That guy just peed
Because Christmastime is killing us!
Stewie:
But can't you see our point of view?
We rely on you.
Can't you see that Christmas cheer
Gets us through the year?
Santa:
My whole crew is black and blue.
Can't you take a clue?
You may think I look great,
But I'm twenty-eight!
Santa and Elves:
Each jingle-bell is a requiem knell,
And while you think it's swell, we are toiling in ----!
Santa:
Take a look, you can tell, as a man, I'm a shell!
Santa and Elves:
Because Christmastime is killing us!
Killing us!
Christmastime is killing us!

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